Seasonal changes afoot...

Twelve days post-surgery and everything is looking good.

The wound dressing was removed after a week to reveal scars much bigger than I anticipated. I had in mind little keyhole scars but the one on my boob is around 3 inches, and the one on the side of my left armpit just a little shorter.

I am not bothered about a bit of scarring. I am already the owner of a large scar on my lower back and a couple on my left leg - all from surgery within the last 15 years or so. These beauties support previous scarring from falling out of trees, off bicycles and diving boards, etc, from childhood to young adulthood.

As an aside, all injuries sustained when I have been sober!

Maybe I should get some tattoos to align with the scars. I have always thought the one on my back would look good as a partly-opened zipper particularly as it's about 8 inches long and disappears towards my bottom!!

Am not sure what I could put on my boob. At the moment it looks like a legless centipede!

Suggestions on a postcard please.....!

I am only on paracetamol now for pain and only when needed...which to be honest is when I am in bed. My boob doesn't hurt at all (unless it's touched!) but my armpit hurts constantly, and it goes a little into overdrive when I go to bed. The ideal sleeping position is on my back but I have a lifetime experience of sleeping on my side - and I wake several times a night having to adjust myself.

I was told it's a minimum 6 week recovery programme so I know I just need to be patient.

Whilst we wait for the biopsy results, my job is to follow a post-surgery exercise regime and also do what I can to reduce the chances of lymphoedema. This is swelling caused by a build-up of fluids in the tissues - and affects people who have had lymph nodes removed (ie me) or had other treatment on the lymphatic system. For me this requires daily self-massage from the left wrist to the chest and will be a necessity for the rest of my life so I may as well get used to it!

In the meantime, I am following the thrice daily exercise regime given to me by the surgeon. I have also been outside walking and am slowly building the strength in my legs and improving my lung capacity - but oh boy, I have a long way to go to get to my fitness levels pre-treatment.

Now that I am well enough I am also enjoying the company of others. I paid a visit to my golf club and caught up with some of the ladies - some of whom I have not seen for 7 months or so. I have been out to friends homes and am actually heading 'out out' this very weekend to a pub in Portishead. I know it doesn't sound much but each occasion is very special for me. This would have been impossible two months ago.

When I last spoke to my Oncologist I had a list of questions to ask and the last on the list was when it would be safe to drink alcohol again. My family have birthdays in March, my friends in April and May and June and mine is in July. I have not really missed the booze, but a glass of fizz in celebration would not go amiss.

He laughed and told me to ask him again in 8-10 weeks but I am not allowed to touch the stuff at the moment. I think he is playing with me - trying to let me down softly. I know that I will be on another treatment regime in 8-10 weeks although we do not yet know what that treatment will entail. It will be either more chemo, more immuno and most definitely radiotherapy. None of which go well with alcohol.

My birthday is around 16 weeks from now..maybe that should be my target.

So the good news.

I am down to 9 tablets a day this week (excluding paracetamol) and every 5 days that number reduces. That is less than half the number I was taking when I left hospital. The majority are steroid which so I am still bloated and putting weight on. But if it keeps me out of hospital I don't care!

Also when I was in hospital I was still completely bald. Not a hair in sight - anywhere!

Six weeks later and I have a full head of tiny little hairs, and it is growing at speed. I won't need a comb for a while but it feels wonderful and is so much better than being bald.

My upper eyelashes are also returning, as have some of the lower lashes and my eyebrows are springing out a hair at a time. My skin, whilst still very thin, is showing some elasticity again and is responding well to the daily moisturising regime. My veins are also visible having all but disappeared during chemo, which means my regular blood giving is so much less painful now.

My haemoglobin is still lower than normal but within an acceptable range, but my anaemia has improved so I have a pink flush and I no longer need another iron transfusion. It is slowly returning to normal levels by itself! Good girl.

I am like a once-neglected plant that has been saved by a lot of tender loving care and a bucketful of hydration and feed.

How appropriate for Spring....